


God Knows We'll Never Have To Do This Again

by Jetse (heikun)



Category: Death Parade (Anime)
Genre: Behind the Scenes, Gen, Other, clavis is elevatorsexual, protect his elevator, them having to film a scene for the opening
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-25
Updated: 2015-06-25
Packaged: 2018-04-06 03:11:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4205757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heikun/pseuds/Jetse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nona and Oculus need to film the last scene for the opening of Death Parade. Clavis is less than willing to lend his elevator. The rest of the cast is just as uncooperative.</p>
            </blockquote>





	God Knows We'll Never Have To Do This Again

**Author's Note:**

> i had such a great idea but my writing skills are so eugh
> 
> here you go anyway laughcry

"No."

 

"Clavis, plea-"

 

"No means no, Oculus! What if you hurt my precious darling?"

 

Oculus sighed and looked back at Nona, who was getting more irritated by the second. The old man shrugged his shoulders.

 

"We'll have to find some other place then," He started to walk away from the stubborn elevator boy, whose arms were crossed and wore a face of childish petulance. Nona stopped him. 

 

"Oculus, it _has_ to be in there. That's how the scene was presented to us," She turned to Clavis, "You'll be there all the time, while we're filming. _Please_."

 

Clavis' frown deepened more. Normally, Nona would have dropkicked him to the floor by now. But Oculus, damn him, was insistent on getting the permission of the stupid bellboy for using the elevator to film a scene.

 

In the opening of the show.

 

Which was Very Important.

 

And said bellboy was currently refusing to 'taint his precious house with the feet of many intruders.'

 

"A small group I'm fine with," He proclaimed loudly, "But the entire cast in there? They won't even fit! And Bella, bless her soul, has already been dirtied enough and yet still works and shines beautifully! How could I taint her more in such a way??? No means no!" at which point Nona had left the talking to Oculus, who _obviously_ was a great sales pitch.

 

Who even names the elevator they merely work in?

 

However, after many negotiations Clavis grudgingly allowed them a day in which they could use to film the less than two second clip that was to be used for the opening sequence. Mostly because both Nona and Oculus were not so tactfully hinting how much they wanted to strangle him. Oculus happily said it would definitely take less than a day, and they would have plenty of time.

 

How wrong he was.

 

* * *

 

 

**First Take: 9:00 am**

 

Half of them were late.

 

Nona and Queen were having a screaming match inside their heads as to why the information processing bureau wasn't there yet, Decim was helping set up the cameras, and Onna was polishing the walls inside the elevator. Clavis was somewhere on the sidelines, sulking.

 

The first take is always the hardest. As soon as the clapperboard went down, everyone pumped their fists in the air with all the enthusiasm of a sad, dying goldfish. They were all nervous as well, even though they had had many scenes before. This one was one with _everyone_. Of course, they would have to redo it when the rest arrived. As a test run, things were already off to a bad start.

 

God knew it could get worse.

 

**Fifth take: 10:12 am**

 

"Goddamn it, Queen, you look fine in this shot!"

 

"You can't even see me! Oculus is covering my face!"

 

"I think I look pretty shit in this myself."

 

"Not you too, Onna!"

 

"Damn you, Oculus! Why would you do that!"

 

"Argh, we'll just re-do the shot!"

 

**Twelfth take: 11:05 am**

 

Ginti arrived, two hours late. Nona knocked him out, and they had to wait for him to recover before they could film again. Clavis was sitting in a corner mourning his poor elevator's treatment.

 

**Thirteenth take: 11:25 am**

 

"Take number thirteen, start!"

 

"Wait, what are we doing?" Ginti asked, and Nona punched him in the face.

 

"WHAT THE FUCK NONA?!?" He yelped, flying backwards into the rest of the cast.

 

"What? That was a demonstration of what we are currently doing, but at a different angle."

 

**Twenty-eighth take: 2:00 pm**

 

"Okay, lunch break. For such a small scene, this is taking ages," Nona groaned as everyone dispersed. Disaster upon disaster had happened as the day wore on. Technical errors, wrong cue times, you name it, it happened. And now, a bigger problem was posed.

 

"No more using my elevator," Clavis looked ready to murder the next person who opposed him. Nona was too tired to deal with him, and left it to Oculus.

 

A few minutes later, Oculus skipped up and hurriedly said, "let's use the passenger lifts instead!" as he flinched from the murderous aura coming from a certain parrot head.

 

"They never specified what elevator we have to use, right?"

 

**Twenty-ninth take: 2:52 pm**

 

"We don't all fit in here, sir!" Some arbiter from the back yelled, and others chorused in with agreements. Nona scowled.

 

"Looks like we'll have to move the camera out of the lift, and take it with them inside and the main characters outside," She sighed, and motioned at Decim and Ginti to move it. Oculus followed her eyes thoughtfully.

 

"Perhaps it'll work."

 

**Thirty-fourth take: 3:36 pm**

 

"SHIT!"

 

"What happened?"

 

"GINTI PUNCHED THE CAMERA!!"

 

"GINTI, YOU-!"

 

"I guess 'm not standing in the front anymore, then."

 

**Fifty-seventh take: 4:49 pm**

 

"Take fifty seven….. start."

 

"WAIT THE DOOR IS CLOSING ON DECIM MAN DOWN MAN DOW-"

 

**Seventy-second take: 6:08 pm**

 

"This one looks okay."

 

"Wait, whats that in the back?"

 

"Oh, Queen and I were playing strip poker."

 

"…"

 

"…"

 

"Take seventy three it is, then."

 

**Eighty-third take: 7:08 pm**

 

"IT'S DONE!"

 

"IS IT?"

 

"OH MY GOD, FINALLY!"

 

Arbiters and other cast members crowded around Nona, eagerly awaiting the okay to leave. Nona replayed it a few times, before nodding. Cheers could be heard as everyone went their separate ways, already laughing about the day behind them. Nona sighed, put down the camera, and fell back onto the ground, worn out. Onna and Decim were walking back to Quindecim, talking quietly. Ginti was heading back to Viginti, but had stopped to talk with Clavis, who was now quietly sniffing over his elevator.

 

Nona sighed to herself. It had been a long day.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> yeah this is really just here if anyone went "whoa! i like this idea!" and wants to expand on it bc i sure as hell would read it mhmm


End file.
